Ihsan Living’s Big Five

    We all do this (meaning Life) for the first time!

    We are all just human Not Divine. This awareness helps to adjust our level of expectations and to reduce judgment and bias towards self and others. It raises our compassion radar. It allows us to start over and to deal with disappointment as well as pleasant surprises.

    We are All in This Together: On the Importance of     Relationships

    What we do – each of us – creates a ripple effect. Nobody is an island! Small acts of kindness – a smile, a hello, some monetary aid, a moment of your time, a helping hand – can transform lives and change our own existence forever. Lack of compassion impoverishes society and our own lives. Developing an honest and kind relationship with others that allows us to accept differences starts with honesty and kindness towards ourselves. We can’t give to others what we don’t feel inside. As the relationships with ourselves and with others contribute to the quality of our lives, we must learn first to be our own best friends.
A true friend is kind yet unapologetically honest. Honesty and patience are prerequisites for lifelong growth and learning.

    The Big Realization: We are Rarely in the Driver’s Seat

    Our birth and death dates are both unknown to us – yet we attempt to control everything in between. We like to produce our own life movies. As our active brains scan for potential danger and disruptions, it soothes us to make elaborate plans that often do not materialize.
Patience, perseverance, steadfastness and trust that things will eventually work out positively influences our mood, reactions and ability to tolerate ambivalence.
A Muslim may say Alhamdulillah (Praise be to God) in all situations, which helps to remember that perceived difficulty or detours in the long-term may be a blessing.
    Yet, most of us – independent of personal differences -experienced times of anxiety and sadness when a desired outcome did not materialize. Yet it’s a reality in life. We don’t get everything we desire in this lifetime and it’s generally for our own best.

    The Big Gs that Change Everything: To Give A Little and Gratitude

    One of life’s greatest skills is the ability to pivot – to give a little. Being able to accept things even if they turned out slightly different and the aptitude to adjust to the unplanned make life easier. It’s hard for some and comes so naturally to others. The ability to “give a little” depends on a variety of factors including the situation at hand, our mental state, anxiety and stress level but it’s also effected by our natural predisposition, personality, family, community and past experiences.
    The good news is that to give a little can be learned, practiced and perfectionated. It aids in the mastery of stress and life in general.

    Gratitude – is the ingredient that changes the taste of and zest for life. Once you understand that everything in life– including relationships, loved ones, health, career, wealth and possessions – are time-limited gifts and we live by it, gratitude rolls off our tongues and fills our hearts.
The habit to compare ourselves to those who have more (or so we think) makes us forget that our quality of life exceeds what most people can ever expect.
Being grateful for small things helps us to live a more meaningful, fulfilled, and joyful lives. Give it a try!

    Memento Mori:  Remember You Will Die!

    Life is transient and equal for all: The One-Way Ticket Out:
    If we see life as a journey with arrival and departure dates remember we don’t determine either. Why are we so adamant to control everything in between? The story of the Last Wishes of Alexander the Great undoubtingly one of history’s most ardent emperors beautifully illustrates that worldly success and achievement – while great as long as they last – will definitely come to an end.
Memento Morti! Remember You Will Die!
    Accepting that this dunia (earthly life) is temporary, that aging is afflicting all of us and that at one time soon we will but be a remote memory is often silenced during daily living.   

    The Islamic quote, “Whoever you love, they will bury you, or you will bury them” is a common expression that all our earthly attachments will eventually end and so will our lives.
Whatever our clients and patients believe the reality of aging and death are existential questions that often come up directly or indirectly in our lives, anxious thought patterns, careers, youth, wealth, and relationships. The impending sense of loss.
Facing the reality of what we can’t escape – endings which include the transition from young to finally old age, start and end of careers and beloved relationships can help us to live a meaningful and principle centered life. It can help us to resolve the dilemma of yesterday by letting it go, by embracing today mindfully and with presence and by being open towards a tomorrow that we can tentatively plan for but not control.